I am a Black woman who was raised by a Black mother. I happen to be the older sister of three Black young ladies. I cherish the relationships that I have with other Black women outside of my family such as my friends, people I work with, mentors, neighbors, and teachers. The reason for this is because these women have been my source of strength; bringing me up when I am down and making me cry with laughter. Therefore, when I read an article written and published by a Black man who is going off on Black women about their supposed negative characteristics I can’t help but become belligerent!
I mean the things that this Black man (let me emphasize on the word BLACK) was saying about us was so out of control that when I first read it, all I could do was laugh. But upon the second and third reading, I started to feel the need to stab this guy in his throat! Figuratively.
So let’s break it down.
The article, written by Mack Major, is called “Rant Against The Extra-Average Black Woman.” The title and the name of the author should have given me a warning about the mess that was about to come out of this man’s mouth. To sum up his piece, this guy has a problem with women who proclaim to be independent Black women. And makes it his life’s purpose to state all the reasons why Black women are not special. Major begins with this:
“Sisters need to come back down to earth and lose that haughty spirit they carry. What about you is so special that good black men should even want to get at you? What things do you bring to the table that will enhance his life by him getting with you?”
Apparently, we do not possess any great qualities that would make Black men want to be with us. Besides our physical endowments we have nothing to offer. Hmmm. Not angry yet? Let’s read more.
“Really? You can’t even stand by black men and have our backs in the public eye. How do we know you’ll honor him if you do manage to catch one? For many years I watched black women dog out the brothers in every possible public forum known to man. They did it in songs, on radio shows, in TV interviews on ABC, CNN and even on Russian TV, in the movies, in the streets.”
Hopefully, you are hopping out of your chair now. I know I did. First of all Mr. Mack Major, you can’t be serious right now. We don’t stand by our Black men and diss them every chance we get? Is this a joke? PLEASE. Who is standing by ya’ll when you are in school? Helping you to figure out what the hell you want to do with your life. Correcting your grammatical mistakes? Wait, let’s be real writing your final papers? I’m sorry, if that isn’t a woman who is down for you I don’t know what is. And let’s not go there with the job situation in this economy. Or matter of fact, let’s go there. Who is supporting ya’ll when you are laid off, in between jobs, unemployed, or just plain trying to get your ish together? BLACK WOMEN. I really don’t have time.
I think Major is a little deluded in his thinking. We disrespect them in the public forum. Ha! I believe it is actually the opposite. The rap game is a fantastic example of this. Being called a bitch, ho, and trick while scantily clothed in videos like “Rack City” or “Birthday Song” isn’t what I would call respectful. The misogyny and degradation of the Black female body by Black men is a everyday occurrence but we are disrespecting them?
OK onto the next.
Here is a question for the ladies. Have you ever wondered, “How come I can’t find a good black man?” or “Where are all the good Black men?” Well, Mack Major has the answer.
“Most of you don’t have a good Black man yet because you are not worthy of one.”
“Many of you are uncle Toms and sellouts, quick to go in front of white folks and throw brothers under the bus.”
What are you talking about Mack? This statement is more true once you flip it. How many times have we seen brothers out there who as soon as they start making money, drop the Black woman they’ve been with since the beginning to get that oh so prized white woman?
Mack goes on to say that we wear the title “independent Black women” like a badge of honor to show that we are better than Black men. Our independence is nothing to be proud of because we at best have average jobs. Mack says, “At best you’re equal. Nothing more. Nothing less.”
For me, being an independent Black woman has nothing to do with being with a man or not. I am an independent Black woman and I am in a relationship with a Black man. It is about reclaiming a positive Black female identity. It is about reasserting and reaffirming my beauty, strength, values, and intelligence. I am a Black woman. This does not mean that I am a bitch. Black woman does not automatically equal ho or trick. I am not what you see on Love & Hip Hop. I am not Nicki Minaj.
This article written by Mack Major is problematic for several reasons. He makes generalizations about Black women without taking into account the diversity of Black women. To say that we are average, unworthy, not special, sellouts, and uncle Toms is inflammatory, degrading, and let’s not forget FALSE. Most of his accusations can also be applied to Black men and people of any race in general. These traits are not specifically a Black woman characteristic. I am really tired of people passing off stereotypes and generalization as facts. Taking one personal experience and then applying it to a whole group of people does not make it true.
All in all, this article left me feeling a little disturbed. Is this really what Black men think about us? Is this what is going through their heads every time they interact with another Black woman? And then I ask myself, do I really care? Nope. I don’t. I don’t know what Black woman would want to be with someone who feels like that. I definitely do not need or want that kind of person in my life. And there are plenty of Black men who appreciate Black women for who they are and not so quick to dish out stereotypes as facts. I probably would have respected him more if he said these are the kind of women I have been running into and this is how these particular women act. I mean, if I was to view Black men from his approach, all Black men would be hustling and selling dime bags on the corner, aspiring rappers, have five baby mamas, in and out of jail, and still living with they mama.
Check out Mack Major’s article at the following link Rant Against The Extra-Average Black Woman. Let us know your thoughts and reactions.